fitness past is haunting me... :S

[amyleanne7]

hi,
im currently working as a model and obviously the pressure is on to look thin, however for job, i needed to be 105lbs, which i achieved, but since then, I have carried on working out and manager loves the idea of me getting thinner because it opens up so many doors for career. I have also noticed that the amount of admirers I have on set has increased rapidly since loosing the weight - im now 87lbs.
At lowest, i was 75lbs a couple of years ago because i became obsessed with not eating and over-exercising - I got so thin that I had to buy clothes and make them smaller. The truth is, I loved that, and so did all the guys, and i want to go back to being that thin, but friends are worried. SHOULD I?
because i love the feeling you get one someone compliments on your small waist, im sure some of you understand..help ?
thanks ladies xx

[cassiegose]

Hi there,

Wait a second... Your profile says that you are 5'8. You want to get down to 75lbs?!?!? Let me ask you an honest question here... Were the compliments that you were receiving nice enough that you would be willing to give your life for them? At that low of weight you are putting yourself at risk for some pretty serious healthy issues that could be fatal. Honestly at 87 lbs I think you should be more concerned with your heart shutting down than with losing more weight. Your weight is already dangerously low. Please please please do not try to lose any more weight!

As for understanding how good it feels to receive compliments on a small waist... yes I do understand that. I had an eating disorder for years and fully understand that feeling. However, as I already said, girl you are too thin at your current weight and I'm worried that you are setting yourself up for some SERIOUS health issues.

I'm sorry if this message is a bit blunt. I don't mean to offend you in any way. However I am very concerned about your current weight. I've been down that road before and I can honestly tell you that you really are setting yourself up for some serious health issues if you don't get some help and put some weight on. Your body was not designed to function at your current weight.

Cassie

[amyleanne7]

Hi there,

Wait a second... Your profile says that you are 5'8. You want to get down to 75lbs?!?!? Let me ask you an honest question here... Were the compliments that you were receiving nice enough that you would be willing to give your life for them? At that low of weight you are putting yourself at risk for some pretty serious healthy issues that could be fatal. Honestly at 87 lbs I think you should be more concerned with your heart shutting down than with losing more weight. Your weight is already dangerously low. Please please please do not try to lose any more weight!

As for understanding how good it feels to receive compliments on a small waist... yes I do understand that. I had an eating disorder for years and fully understand that feeling. However, as I already said, girl you are too thin at your current weight and I'm worried that you are setting yourself up for some SERIOUS health issues.

I'm sorry if this message is a bit blunt. I don't mean to offend you in any way. However I am very concerned about your current weight. I've been down that road before and I can honestly tell you that you really are setting yourself up for some serious health issues if you don't get some help and put some weight on. Your body was not designed to function at your current weight.

Cassie

hi cassie
thanks so much for replying - it means a lot
i do understand what your saying, i completely am grateful for your advice
however, the last time i gained weight (after i was 82lbs), I just gained fat and sat around for weeks without exercise in an attempt to get over 100lbs. the thing is, this time, i dont want to gain any more fat because the modelling i do is lingerie and if you gain fat its really obvious in the pictures lol so i was wondering if there was i way i can gain a bit of weight without getting more fat, or becoming muscly? xx

[cassiegose]

Amy,

Youre very welcome. I'm more than happy to help in any way i can.

If you're going to gain weight its either going to have to be fat, muscle, or both. I understand your fear of putting on a bunch of fat, especially with your occupation. advice would be to go on what is called a healthy bulk (I'm actually on one right now) to put on some healthy weight. Why are you afraid of putting on muscle? I think adding a bit of muscle would actually help your appearance by giving you some muscle tone and shape. I know you definitely don't want to look bulky or overly muscular as that wouldn't be beneficial for your occupation. However, keep in mind that it is pretty much impossible for women to gain a significant amount of muscle without the help of steroids or other illegal substances (assuming youre not a genetic freak). I lift weights 4 days a week and work hard to build muscle and still haven't been able to build as much as i would like.

Sooo something you might consider would be to increase calories, decrease cardio, and begin a basic weight training program. However, I wouldn't advise you to begin ANY program without first seeing a doctor to make sure you are healthy enough to do so.

One thing I do need to ask you... do you really love your job so much that you would risk your life for it? I can't imagine anything being that important to me.

[amyleanne7]

Amy,

Youre very welcome. I'm more than happy to help in any way i can.

If you're going to gain weight its either going to have to be fat, muscle, or both. I understand your fear of putting on a bunch of fat, especially with your occupation. advice would be to go on what is called a healthy bulk (I'm actually on one right now) to put on some healthy weight. Why are you afraid of putting on muscle? I think adding a bit of muscle would actually help your appearance by giving you some muscle tone and shape. I know you definitely don't want to look bulky or overly muscular as that wouldn't be beneficial for your occupation. However, keep in mind that it is pretty much impossible for women to gain a significant amount of muscle without the help of steroids or other illegal substances (assuming youre not a genetic freak). I lift weights 4 days a week and work hard to build muscle and still haven't been able to build as much as i would like.

Sooo something you might consider would be to increase calories, decrease cardio, and begin a basic weight training program. However, I wouldn't advise you to begin ANY program without first seeing a doctor to make sure you are healthy enough to do so.

One thing I do need to ask you... do you really love your job so much that you would risk your life for it? I can't imagine anything being that important to me.

thank you so so so much
i think first step is to carry on with cardio obviously, and to try eating a bit more because I practically live on fruit and veg as of lately, and then i will try and slow down weight loss until i can maintain weight, and then i will cross the bridge of putting it on.
i completely understand that being as thin as me isnt very healthy, but in line of work, its not just about the shape - its also about what the scales say, so seeing those numbers rising is a very daunting thought, seeing as I have been on a constant decent since I was 110lbs about a year ago.
so i am gonna see doctor asap, thanks so much for this again
and i think i do love job that much, as not only is it job but it's way of life and i haven't known any different for a couple of years and loosing out on the friends i have made would be awful.

Its going to be hard for me to cut down cardio as i am a personal trainer at local gym during the times when no modelling work is available, so I do up to 4 one-to-one sessions each day. I know a lot of trainers just instruct rather than exercise with their students, but i feel it appropriate to be hands on and to exercise with them to encourage them, so this is up to 4 hours of cardio a day for me so its going to be hard lol

thank you thank you thank you x

[Boss Man]

I agree. You can only gain muscle or Fat. Maybe a bit of Water as well, but that's all.

You musn't keep doing what you're doing if it could risk your health or life. Forgive this next comment, but If someone expects you to look too thin and unhealthy for the work, or intimates, if you put a little more weight on, you'd lose the work, they are basically abusing you. Sorry ot sya that but it's true.

They would be forcing you to be potentially unhealthy, to retain a contract, which is not fair on you, and highly unethical.

This is not your fault, this is poor regulation of the industry here. Britain is as guilty as any other country, especially those countries, promoting models in the last few years that died.

Muscle gain for women is not easy, as Testosterone is very low in Women, but it is perfectly doable.

Cassie is a prime axample of how muscle can be very artistic, beautiful and healthy and I know she can go further and make more of her wonderful gifts.

You may have to tweak diet and alter some kind of training regime, but what you want is not impossible by any stretch of the imagination, so no worries yeah .

[amyleanne7]

I agree. You can only gain muscle or Fat. Maybe a bit of Water as well, but that's all.

You musn't keep doing what you're doing if it could risk your health or life. Forgive this next comment, but If someone expects you to look too thin and unhealthy for the work, or intimates, if you put a little more weight on, you'd lose the work, they are basically abusing you. Sorry ot sya that but it's true.

They would be forcing you to be potentially unhealthy, to retain a contract, which is not fair on you, and highly unethical.

This is not your fault, this is poor regulation of the industry here. Britain is as guilty as any other country, especially those countries, promoting models in the last few years that died.

Muscle gain for women is not easy, as Testosterone is very low in Women, but it is perfectly doable.

Cassie is a prime axample of how muscle can be very artistic, beautiful and healthy and I know she can go further and make more of her wonderful gifts.

You may have to tweak diet and alter some kind of training regime, but what you want is not impossible by any stretch of the imagination, so no worries yeah .

thank you for that
im making an appointment with GP tomorrow and will then attempt to maintain and eventually gain weight.
what is the lowest healthy weight i can be, considering im 5'8"? x

[Boss Man]

I'd go back to 105lbs, and if anyone makes an issue out it, tell them you aren't going to suffer for your art, because your health isn't worth what they're paying.

You do PT work anyway, so you have something to fall back on anyway.

Until you actually get a GP consultation, and make any necessary changes to diet, don't train, except where necessary I.E classes. Your eating patterns have probably promoted inadequate nutrient consumption, particularly of things like Calcium, Vit D, Magnesium, Boron, Phoshorous, Vit K2, Copper and Manganese, all of which are players in bone health.

If you attempted to do any resistance work with inadequate Bone density, you could increase fracture risk.

There are ways to tell if this might happen, by doing a score test on someones bones.

There are 2 types, a T score and a Z score.

Z score is based on an average Bone density, in relation to someone of the same gender and roughly same age.

T Score, works on the basis of an average healthy 30 year old .

If you score higher than -1 you're fine.

Between -1 and -2.5 is Osteopenia, (thinning bones), which is correctable.

Below -2.5 is Osteoperosis, which is very, very hard to correct, though not impossible.

Should this at all be reccomended as part of the evaluation, it may be suggested you modify the eating habits, to boost some or all of the aforementioned nutrients, I listed above, with suggested foods and also with possibly a follow up consultation, I would estimate 4-8 weeks after your initial consult. to ascertain the effects of these changes on Bone health.

This is of course dependant on if you get tested at all, as this might not be suggested, but if it is and if it may be outside of the GP's remit, it would almost certainly have to be done at another facility, either at a clinic, or a facility attatched to a hospital, more than likely.

I have never had to have this kind of thing done, or felt it necessary, so I can't say for sure, the correct protocol the NHS uses for a test of this type.

GOOD LUCK and try not to worry about anything too much yeah, but remember the outside of you, can reflect in some way the person inside, not just with personality, but health too and looks should never be a mask or veneer, to hide internal problems, when it's avoidable.

You have a right to be beautiful inside too. Your wishes to change / care for yourself, teach others, and come here and respect us with your kind attitude, indicates you can be such a person, so keep trying to be that person and don't live in a way that robs you of some of that beauty. You're clearly worth more to this world and others, than any photographer can pay you, believe me .

[amyleanne7]

aw thankyou guys,
your all so friendly and encouraging
i made an appointment with gp for next tuesday and until then i am going to try and not go too mad
thank again <3 xx

[cassiegose]

Yay! Great job on taking the steps to make sure that you're in good health! You seem like a smart, wonderful, kind young lady and I would hate to see your current occupation/situation have serious negative effects on your health. Please please keep us posted ok?

[amyleanne7]

ok, i had a mis-hap
i went back to exercising madly, and i know i shouldn't have, but it was just that i had a vomiting bug, and it made me lose weight, and i got addicted to the buzz of getting thinner :/
clothes are already baggy but i feel i need to be thinner :S
im not letting this defeat me though.. xx

[cassiegose]

Hey there,

Long time no hear!

I'm sorry to hear that you had a "mis-hap". I understand how that goes... Anything we can do to help?

[Boss Man]

Well I know you'll understand what I'm saying here and you'll know why I'm sasying it, but trust me, truthfully and honestly okay , you don't need to be thinner. You weigh 85lbs according to your profile and that nmber was the same last time you posted, I'm sure, so given what you said before it could even be lower.

I'm telling you this, because I care a lot about your welfare, but you need to be heavier. You really, really do. Yo may be a model, but as I've said befor,e NOBODY, I repat NOBODY has the right to dictate that you should look close to or even become dangerously thin, if they do, thenr they're horrible people who's photo money is NOt worth potentially your life. You will have a lot longer life than a modelling career and you should feel good on the inside as well as look good on the outside. Looking good can often never reveal how the persons body really is on the inside.

You could be around 110-120lbs lean tight muscle, not potentially stick like with very pointy ribs. Long-term you will only hurt yourself, physically and mentally and risk considerably shortening your life, by getting inadequate amounts of nutrition per day.

As a site and myself in particular, we would be being negligent if your personal info and admissions were ignored, or passed off as okay for your well-being. They're not okay, thye really aren't .

For now, you need to stop exercising completely. If you don't eat enough, you won't for one get adequate things like Copper, Vit C, Vit D, Vit K2, Calcium, Magnesium Phosphorus, Silicon and Boron in your diet, meaning you could be getting poor bone health, something known as Osteopenia, where you have a situation betwen Osteoperosis and healthy Bone density.

To exercise in any way, with Bones that become increasingly intolerant to the stress on them, even from things like jogging, could one day soon, cause a fracture or hairline crack of a bone, because normal tolerances would one day become too much for one or more of your Bones / joints.

I suggest for now you need to focus on a proper regimented eating plan, as I suspect you might be eating willy-nilly or having too few meals.

I suggest a 6 meal a day strategy based on small portions. So it gets you into the habit of eating regularly and sticking to it.

So something like this.

600 calories a day, 6 meals a day, 100 calories a meal, (for one week only), to allow you to get on a proper eating schedule.

Breakfast

Small portion of Cereal with a bit of Skimmed Mlk + a small Egg.

Snack

10 Peanuts + a few Berries. Let the Berries digest for 10-15 minutes, then eat the Peanuts

Lunch.

Small amount of Beans and Rice.

Snack

50g Chicken with a small Tomato and 3-4 slices of Cucumber.

Dinner

50g of Turkey and a small Broccoli stalk

Snack

Same as Lunch.

This is only for 1 week, remember, to get you used to eating properly again. Next week when your body is used to this, add 50% more food to each meal and repeat this adding process every week. until you're around 2,100 calories a day, then begin exercising again, with moderate exercise, not lots of exercise.

We CAN help you, but please, please let us and please keep us informed regularly of what you're doing, because if you don't, we can't help you very much and you'll be putting yourself at more risk.

We DO care, you have to believe in that, but to care for yourself better in this situation, you must let those that want to care, be a constant in your life. We won't ever judge, patronise or throw you on the scrapheap, but we will do what we can to support, encourage, reassure and look after you, if you are willing to let us and willing to be honest with us about everything you do and give us regular updates. If possible a journal with daily or almost daily contributions would help, to keep you accountable and us to be able to give you the support and encouragement you need and DESERVE.

You CAN take more control of this situation and we CAN help you okay . You're a truly beautiful person inside, so don't spoil that with ugly habits and a problematic way of living.

Let us help you, and give us the regular feedback we need to keep helping you yeah .

I KNOW you're worth and deserve every second of the help and support we can give and worth every word that's typed, the one one answer I want to know is, do YOU think you're worth it?

.

[amyleanne7]

hi all
thank you soooo much for all your help and advice
im trying that eating plan at the moment, and its frightening to say that after just a few days, i started to kinda notice the effects
i've also been changing the meals round daily for variety
also because im not used to eating, i felt quite bloated, although, worryingly, i've caught the winter vomiting bug, and im finding it hard to eat without being sick at the moment. it started last night, so in a couple of days i hope to be better, although i weighed myself this evening, and after mishap, i got down to 78lbs, and after a couple days on the new diet, i already weighed 79lbs BUT since having this bug for less than 24 hours, i've already lost 3lbs, and am down to 76 lbs, through not being able to eat, because stomach muscles keep contracting. this is worrying me because if it lasts for another 24 hours, i could be 73lbs, and if it lasts any longer than that, i think i'll end up puking up actual stomach lol
i really am worried about this..i dont want to get any thinner. hips jut out and stomach is completely concave. you can literally count ribs and i can fit 2 hands around thigh really easily. i can nearly fit one hand around calves, and arms look thinner than sticks!
people moan about mid-drifts and bingo wings, but they dont know what its like to be like this - at least they have energy!
since friday, i have hardly moved, only to the kitchen to get food and to the bathroom, so im not exercising
is there anything i can do to stop losing weight while im ill? :S

thank you so much. i appreciate this
love you all dearly XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[Nokie173]

If you can't eat solid food... try drinking some stuff?? Like fruit juice...?? Protein shake?
I was sick a week or 2 ago and kept throwing up food then got this crazy head ache.
Couldn't eat much but needed some calories and energy... I find drinking stuff helped a lot...
Once you get energy.... please try to eat more.. if your hip is sticking out... yeah, you're a tad too thin.
But i'm glad you're trying to do something about it... Keep trying girl...