Jena's Journal.

[MissJenaKay]

Thanks, Boss. ^_^

[fitoverforty]

I'm an artist and a writer, I just haven't had any inspiration. So why waste supplies is I'm not going to produce anything?

I understand that feeling. I am an artist and have written poetry all life. I find sometimes that when I am down or depressed I can tap into those feelings and write some of most intense and strong poems. In artwork, I have found that it helps bring me out of any dark places I have been, because it literally forces me to recognize the talent and good thing that I have. It always inspires me and makes me feel better, even if it comes from a sad place inside, it helps me deal with it. Kind of a therapy all in it's own.

I'm trying.... I've set an alarm every day and every day I turn it off in sleepy half-lucidness instead of actually waking up.

Have you tried putting it across the room, so you have to get up out of the bed to turn it off? That helped son to get up, he is a real sleepy head in the a.m.

Sorry I've been acting like a brat lately. I've been having huge issues with bipolar and depression lately. I know it's no real excuse, but I sincerely apologize if I offend anyone.

Don't apologize for how you feel. We are just trying to help, although no one can understand exactly how you feel...we have all had our own troubles and stumblings in life, and try to share our experience in how we dealt with our own feelings, and want to help you through yours. I wish you nothing but the best and i hope we can help you, inspire you, educate you, etc., to help you along your journey.

[fit-fanatic-2025]

Maybe you could just stay awake all night and the next day and then go to sleep around whatever time you want to go to sleep at and see how that works? That's if there is no way you can get up in the morning.

By the way, I really admire both of you, Jena and Lynne for having that creative flair, Lucky you guys!

[MissJenaKay]

@ Lynne :: art always ends up TERRIBLE if I try to draw when I'm depressed, it never ends up being anything and when I'm depressed, I feel miserable about talent. I feel like I'm a terrible artist and then since I can never produce anything, it's like "See, I told you." in head. As for the alarm clock moving thing. I would try that, but I have no where else but nightstand that I can put the alarm clock. Same at school which is why on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, I end up waking up late. I for some reason have an issue waking up unless I have something I HAVE to do that morning, like an appointment or class. Hence why I managed to wake up at 9:30 yesterday, I had a dentist appointment at noon. It's a psychological thing I guess. Also, I feel really bad when I snap at people because I feel like I should be able to control it, but I can't seem to.

@ Rebekah :: There's no way I could stay up for that long, I'd crash... I could try it, but then if I last until like five pm, if I fall asleep then, sleeping will be even more messed up than before.Thanks, I don't think I'm terribly good or anything. I mean, I know I'm not too shabby, but.... Yeah.

[fit-fanatic-2025]

I bet your talented!! Yeah the all nighter might be tough, another thought is if you havve someone that gets up early in your house just have them wake you up every day for a while and then you can get in the habit..

[MissJenaKay]

If you want, I can post a few of artworks on here.... Also, daddy leaves the house at 4:30 am, but momma leave at 7:30ish... I'll see if I can get her to take me up in the morning for a few days.

[fit-fanatic-2025]

Definitely post them on here! Sounds good having your mom wake you up.

[MissJenaKay]

By the way, as you will note, almost EVERY figure I draw is a female. I don't know why, but I seem to be unable to draw men. They always end up looking like girls. XD

Did that during junior year of highschool
June of 09
Date is on it.
Not the best drawing, but I think it's cute as all get out.
Done in January this year
Done in October. Quality sucks because I didn't have a scanner

There's a few of pieces that I have uploaded, they're the ones I like more than others, they're still not that great though... There's examples of both more realistic and stylized styles.

[fitoverforty]

Those are beautiful Jena. You are truly a gifted artist. Don't ever doubt your ability or your talent, rather expound upon it, nurture it, let it breath and live - it is such a rare gift to be able to create the art pieces you have shared. Believe it. Thank you for sharing them.

[MissJenaKay]

You're welcome guys. I love creating, but I've noticed lately that I've been able to produce nearly nothing. :/

[fit-fanatic-2025]

Really nice Jena! You definitely are talented. What are you thinking of majoring in? If you don't want to say on here that's fine too. Just wondered in you are going to use your talents in a career..

[Fygle]

Lovely drawings! Talent alert!

[Boss Man]

You have a talent. Be proud of yourself and don't stop believing that you have a lot of human worth, becasue you DO .

Oh yeah and if you're strugging for things to draw, why not draw a picture of yourself, depicting how you want to look physically. It might motiviate you to push on towards the better body you want.

[MissJenaKay]

9:33 Wake Up

10:40
-- 3/4 c All Whites
-- 1/2 c Carrots
-- 2 tbs Fat Free Cheese
-- 2 tbs Catsup

1:16
-- 4 oz Tilapia Fillet
-- 1.5 c Spring Mix Salad
-- 3 oz Carrots

5:34
-- Turkey Melt Sandwich (We ate out after shopping. DX)
-- 1 Apple
-- 1 scoop of vanilla icecream

8:55
-- Egg Salad : 1 egg, 2/3 tbs Light Mayo, 2/3 tbs Mustard, 1 2/3 tbs chopped onion, 1/3 tbs green bell pepper
-- 3 oz Baby Carrots

Really nice Jena! You definitely are talented. What are you thinking of majoring in? If you don't want to say on here that's fine too. Just wondered in you are going to use your talents in a career..

I'm an Art major. ^_^

Lovely drawings! Talent alert!

Thanks. They aren't nearly as good as I'd like.

You have a talent. Be proud of yourself and don't stop believing that you have a lot of human worth, becasue you DO .

Oh yeah and if you're strugging for things to draw, why not draw a picture of yourself, depicting how you want to look physically. It might motiviate you to push on towards the better body you want.

HAHAHAHAH. I fail at drawing human bodies unless I draw them stylized.

P.S. Went shopping for new clothing today since every pair of jeans I own either A) Is too big or B) Has holes on the inner thighs. What a depressing venture that was. :/ :/ What extra sucks, I went to Fashionbug where I normally can get jeans and I was neither thin enough nor fat enough to get well fitting jeans. :/ :/ So we came home and had to order jeans online because the store was out of the stock for the size jeans I wear. FML. I bought some tops and I found ONE pair of jeans while I was there. Best part, tops actually looks like girl's clothing so I will no longer look so much like a man. Yay. I probably will still stick to t-shirts and sweatshirts though since they are more comfy. Oh well, I like the clothes I bought, I just don't know if I like them enough to wear them around people all that much. :/ Oh well.

[fit-fanatic-2025]

I'm an Art major. ^_^

I'm glad. It sounds like that major will be a nice fit!