New here, need serious help!

[samlondon]

Ok, so Im new on here. I need help because as much as I know i need to lose weight and get healthy, I have no motivation. It seems so silly, I cant set foot in a gym, even though I know no one is watching me, I am very very body conscious when it comes to hanging out with all these fit healthy people. I dont like to even workout in front of husband! I know that seems very silly. I am very unfit, I can run for maybe 30 seconds and thats it, I run out of breath and legs hurt bad and burn and I feel like I literally cannot go on. I live in Texas and it gets incredibly hot here in the summer. I cant stand to get all gross and sweaty ( god i sound like a princess, im not i swear!). I eat too much and way too frequent, it seems like I have a constant appetite, im also on the contraceptive shot so I have put on another 15lbs so far and I have another month left before that runs out. Anyway the point is, I dont want to be skinny at all, just healthy looking and not be ashamed to take clothes off in front of husband and to not feel so gross at the mall or cry in a dressing room anymore, we will be trying for a baby soon and I want to get body healthy before I get pregnant. I just need help with motivation, I have none, I know I need to do something about it but I just cant be bothered basically, help me!!

[feelin-great]

Welcome to the site

It sounds like you know why you are not at your ideal weight, now you just need to change those ways. First of all, you need to change your diet, and second, you need to start working out. I don't belong to a gym but I have been able to lose just under 24 pounds since the beginning of the year, so joining a gym isn't an absolute necessity. What you need to do is get yourself motivated to work out other ways. I use DVDs that I can do in the privacy of home so nobody can see me. If you don't want to work out in front of your husband then do it in a different room, or when he isn't home.

I think the biggest thing here is that you need to get yourself motivated to make a change. If you aren't mentally ready and willing to put in the hard work necessary, then you will set yourself up for failure. Keep up with this site, maybe start a diet journal in that section. People on this site are extremely helpful and will helo you through it. Start reading some of the posts and see what others are doing. You will get a ton of support if you want it!

If you stick with this site and work hard, you can do it, and you can be healthy, but it is definitely a choice you have to make every day. Good luck!

[Fygle]

That's a motivation right there brenty!

[samlondon]

Thank you feeling-great good advice i like that. I have a few of the dvds you can get and I just need to get back into the swing of things. Actually after joining the site, I went out and walked 2 miles, and its about 80 degrees today, pushing a baby in a push chair so I feel like I have started already!

[samlondon]

Option a)
Get motivated to get in shape

Option b)
Heart disease, stroke, diabetes, high blood pressure, cancer, hip, knee, back pain, shopping at big and tall

Pick one of those two, be happy with whichever one you pick.

Thank you for your very blunt advice, unfortunately, main reason behind lack of want to do it, is a low self esteem and Im one of those idiots that smokes regardless of the knowledge that it will kill me, so the whole heart disease, stroke type stuff stupidly does nothing for me, biggest motivation is that husband might leave me for a skinnier model, as much as he says he wont. So thank you anyway! Just need the mental feminine type support!

[Fygle]

Ah you're right, but now we're already in hell so might as well keep posting?

[feelin-great]

I just realized I typed in the womans area, hey fygle were gonna burn brother!

Men! Just kidding guys, you're great

Anyway Sam (or do you prefer Samantha). There are so many knowledgeable people on this site - I can't say I am one of them but I have learned so much from everyone here and they have given so much support. If you are really serious about wanting to get healthy you should start a journal - check them out in Workout Journals and Diet Journals so you can see what others are doing.

[samlondon]

I just realized I typed in the womans area, hey fygle were gonna burn brother!

Hey samlondon, I know its hard. Whatever you do keep working at it, you CAN do it. But I will leave you the the woman here, you'll be in good hands!

Sorry for tresspassing!!

hahahahaa

Hey thank you all for your advice, brentyboy and fygle its all good, i need support from everyone so dont stress it! are you guys on here to lose weight or to buff up?maybe we can just support each other...??

[Nokie173]

Hey girl,

Welcome to the site. I completely know how you feel. First off focus on your diet... Like what you eat and when you eat? Diet a lone will help you loose weight. Now, being healthy and fit… exercise will be great to add. You don’t have to go to the gym to workout. You can workout at home using bodyweight… lunges (front, back, side), squats (frog, sumo) push ups, leg raise, jumping jacks, burpees etc… And you don’t have to start out running right away…. Start out walking… then run for 30secs would work. Then walk again…then run for 30secs again then walk again… try doing that for 20-25mins..

What I learn is to be patient. Have little goals… measure yourself so you can keep you progress. Once you see some results you will continue to do it!

[samlondon]

Hey girl,

Welcome to the site. I completely know how you feel. First off focus on your diet... Like what you eat and when you eat? Diet a lone will help you loose weight. Now, being healthy and fit… exercise will be great to add. You don’t have to go to the gym to workout. You can workout at home using bodyweight… lunges (front, back, side), squats (frog, sumo) push ups, leg raise, jumping jacks, burpees etc… And you don’t have to start out running right away…. Start out walking… then run for 30secs would work. Then walk again…then run for 30secs again then walk again… try doing that for 20-25mins..

What I learn is to be patient. Have little goals… measure yourself so you can keep you progress. Once you see some results you will continue to do it!

Thank you! I really appreciate all support I can get, that is main issue, I dont have any self esteem and so if I have people believe in me, maybe I will get further in quest to look beautiful on the inside and out!

[Boss Man]

You were a really lovely looking bride. Your weight is certainly not a massive problem, so you shouldn't have too many issues getting it down. You may be eating well, but the walking could be causing issues if the body is adapting to it and it stops working as well.

You might be better if possible to get a Gym membership, so you can start some quality weights and couple it with Cardio that might be more progressive for your needs.

Certainly though diet is going to play a big part, so hopefully you're making sure your calories are not silly low and you're doing what could be considered the right sort of thing to do.

We can assist with that if you like . Obviously the shot you had may continue causing issues and of course I don't know when the effects will cease, but hopefully it shouldn't be too long before you can really start to see the changes you want, so don't be too disheartened, keep believing yeah and GOOD LUCK.

If you want our support you'll always be welcome to ask for it .

[NickiAnderson]

I think you need to take a deep breath and then sit down and think about what you're willing to change first. Sure, ideally I'd love to see you change your life over night, but it's not going to happen. So why not take it slow and make GRADUAL changes. If you can only manage 30-40 seconds of activity, why not challenge yourself to walk around our block a couple of times to begin and add on each week, it's great watchign the progress. Second, with nutrition, pick something you need to change and start with that, as it gets easier, then move on to the next thing you need to change.

It's hard and low self-esteem is definitely something that will effect your overall motivation. So you've got plenty of support here. Take it one day at a time, vowing to yourself that you're worth making positive changes. Journal your success and share it with us just as you'd share your challenges.

You can do it!

[Boss Man]

I totally agree with this approach. If you have trouble getting into a new lifestyle system, break it down into little bits, or even segments. So in a segmented style you get used to the diet first for 2-3 weeks, then when you're solid on the changes and consistent, get used to regularly exercising for 3-5 days a week.

Obviously in the bit by bit system, it might require baby steps, like making sure you always eat a healthy Breakfast and working on from there. That's not trying to patronise you, by saying you couldn't adequately handle significant change, but if you were struggling to be consistent, even that little by little approach, might be more beneficial for you.

[samlondon]

Thanks guys, I really appreciate it, and thats what im trying to do, little by little. I got real sick due to the shot this past weekend and the weight I have put on due to this shot is crazy and i am really mad about it, i swear im actually putting on weight in sleep! lol.but thanks for the support, websites like this normally are really intimidating as they are normally for people who are already fit and very healthy and slim and it makes me feel worse, but with some good support i know i can do it!

[samlondon]

You were a really lovely looking bride. Your weight is certainly not a massive problem, so you shouldn't have too many issues getting it down. You may be eating well, but the walking could be causing issues if the body is adapting to it and it stops working as well.

You might be better if possible to get a Gym membership, so you can start some quality weights and couple it with Cardio that might be more progressive for your needs.

Certainly though diet is going to play a big part, so hopefully you're making sure your calories are not silly low and you're doing what could be considered the right sort of thing to do.

We can assist with that if you like . Obviously the shot you had may continue causing issues and of course I don't know when the effects will cease, but hopefully it shouldn't be too long before you can really start to see the changes you want, so don't be too disheartened, keep believing yeah and GOOD LUCK.

If you want our support you'll always be welcome to ask for it .

Thank you for the compliment! I dont really like to go to gyms as I feel very body conscious, I like to work out by myself. I have taken up tennis, im not very good but 30 minutes of running around a tennis court chasing a ball worked me out, so i figure it has to be good for you right? i will be off this shot in the next month as i am literally putting on weight as i sleep even if i didnt eat for 4 hours before i went to bed, ive given up on looking at the scales, they depress me lol