I know you've been through some hard stuff Christina, but you've not given up on yourself and you're right, you have come too far to give up on yourself.
The effort and attention you have given to yourself since this happened has been amazing and you are a seriously amazing Lady and and it is this change in the person you are on the inside, compared to even 2 years ago, that WILL allow you to someday soon become the person you want to be physically.
I am 10,000,000% behind you all the way and I am sending you a
BIG HUG because I am incredibly, incredibly proud of you Christina and I am absolutely certain, that if there is any type of person who can overcome these kinds of problems and get all the way, it is someone like you.
You never fail to impress me with how you achieve the highs and when the lows happen you still fight to overcome them and you talk about them with a sense of beauty and grace and dignity and you are someone that I have never stopped believing in, even when it potentially looked to some, like you might be one of those couldn't stick to it kind of people, that would keep taking 2 steps forwards and 2 steps back, getting too much false hope coupled with reversal of fortunes.
However you are not that person now and never giving up on yourself was imperative, because that is the one and most important thing, that you had to do to keep going, because it was the one thing that allowed you to have any chance of succeeding, because the people who give up never succeed, regardless of whether the physical goal was attainable or not.
You are a beautiful, wonderful and special person and that heart-warming smile says it all about a fighter that has come back from a heart-breaking experience and is achieving great things and making great strides forwards, because people who feel heart-broken might smile at the time, but it is an act, not the natural smile you have got in that picture, which is smiling out of choice, not necessity or to hide some other emotions.
You're making me smile inside as I write this, because I've been around to read so many of the ups and downs with you and see how many times life has made you feel second rate or second best and as if you are not allowed to feel and have the happiness you're striving for and I can tell you that you ARE worth those things and you deserve the happiness you get and will go on to get more of and as always your words tell of sadness, but emoted from the heart and laced with beauty and real, organic emotion that can't be faked, as this did happen to you and you did feel like your world was to some extent falling down around your ears.
The half marathon might be possible this year, but certainly I reckon if you keep doing what you're doing, you'll be a strong certainty to be running that by April next year and I will be in your corner every step of the way, as long as fate will let me and I will be around for you to bitch at, use as an emotional punch bag, or just to reach out and give you a small part of centre, when you smile or when you hurt, because I want you to succeed and be happy for you and for selfless reasons, because you deserve the feelings and emotions in your life, you've been partly deprived of so far in life, as often as you should have had them and I want you to be able to look at yourself in the mirror one day and feel beautiful, feminine, sensuous and alive and like a more complete person and not whatever some people used to call you, or say about you in the past, because those people were full of crap.
So keep pushing, keep believing, keep smiling that epic, amazing smile and
GOOD LUCK, because you CAN do this and you ARE worth it and like I said, I am extremely proud of you, because you stood up for yourself with your actions and didn't take what any doctor told you lying down.
